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getting a life
Friday, 11 July 2025 13:04have i made a single friend in the city i moved to 6 months ago? nope! but thats okay. im in the fucked up position of being painfully shy, socially inept, but also fairly extroverted in the sense that i love spending time with people (even strangers) a lot. i guess i can consider some of my coworkers my friends but its obviously not the same. i wallowed in the sad state of my social/love life the first couple months after moving but i have been forcing myself to just Go Outside And Touch Grass and i feel a lot better even though at the base level i am still pretty lonely.
- i joined a figure drawing co-op! in the one year of art school i attended before dropping out, figure drawing was probably my favorite class. though i do not mean that in the sense that figure drawing is something im deeply passionate about as an art form - i just like the way figure drawing sessions are structured (increasingly long poses/drawing times) and i like the way the time limit immediately puts my brain into a flow state. so relaxing!!! anyways, the co-op is monday nights at the local art school and it really makes me happy to do, which is nice because art school sort of killed my love of drawing for the past ~7 years. i even started making linocut prints again! lots of nice low-pressure social interaction with randos there, and lots of free compliments on my gesture drawings which doesn't hurt. the other thing i love about figure drawing is that it always gives me such a strong affection/appreciation for the appearances of people in ways that feel wildly outside of conventional beauty standards. i leave sessions thinking shit like "that guy had fantastic earlobes" and "what a perfectly made knee!"
- i became a card carrying member of my city's film society. the cinema the program runs through is a non-profit meant to support independent film, and the ticket/concession prices are dirt cheap compared to the big chains. i love it! the 10 minute bike ride across the river there is amazing especially when the sun is setting in the evening. i saw 6 movies in theaters last month. they also do a special showing for the film society with a speaker and a Q&A session. i didn't talk at the ones i went to yet but maybe one day i will...
- piano lessons.....that i just signed up for the other day. i was originally debating joining a choir even though i am not really a singer, but it requires a full year commitment to weekly practice which is a bit much. but i miss piano (took lessons when i was a kid and quit because i was a snotty 7th grader). first one is next week so we'll see how much i have completely forgotten how to read music. plus i found out my local library has a room with a grand piano you can reserve for free yayyyyy my taxes!!!!!
- dating and then giving up on dating and then dating again. those of you who follow me on twitter already know the humiliating train wreck i endured at the hands of Comedian Man. for the uninformed, i briefly attempted to date an engineer who also does stand-up on the side. it was about 1 month of explosive sexual chemistry, then him ghosting me, me being confused because i have never been able to read the room, him apologizing 3 months later and wanting to get together again, and then him almost immediately ghosting me again 2 weeks later. if i open our text chain its just 3 unanswered messages i sent him across ~10 days. humiliating!!!!!! but embarrassing yourself is the spice of life and i feel like i am kind of a weird embarrassment adrenaline junkie. i dont care enough about social niceties to not share my thoughts so i always do. anyways, since my attempts to be #casual and #relaxed in dating did not work, i then tried to be serious. 4 different people proceeded to cancel on me day-of and did not reschedule, and then a 5th person fully stood me up. and that felt like a sign from the universe to abandon all hope. so i stopped for a while. but i got bored and picked it up again recently. went on a really good date this week (so good that we already have 2nd date plans) but i probably shouldn't get ahead of myself. we didn't even kiss! i thought maybe i should try having decorum and stop sleeping with people on the first date but its hard when you're a real #lover....
- as per usual, climbing gym + associated free yoga classes. i dont think i go on a consistent enough schedule to be recognizable to people yet but i switched gyms and really like the new one so much better.
- signing up for random bullshit! japanese weaving class at the arboretum? i'm there. shifts at the food bank? sure, i love packing boxes. being a greeter for the horticulture program's area at the state fair? absolutely.
